boon's log 2205.04: Lurve Cactus

The Lurve Cacti - made for each other - and the lone ranger

When you are in a relationship where everyone else in your family says it is a wrong thing to do - what would you do?

It's been quite sometime since you broke up with your previous love and you think that you've finally bumped into the person that you possibly may spend the rest of your life with. Ideas that he/she may be the one and the both of you are made for each other. The problem is - the folks at home disagree to it and starts to throw insults at the person for reasons which you think are rather unreasonable (but to them, they think that they have a point), for example, your "other half" has lower qualifications than you, or your "other half" smokes like a chimney (but you don't really mind, 'cause love is blind...), or your "other half" is a divorcee, etc., etc. - what would you do?

No, I am not having problems with my relationships. Just that one of my colleagues in the work area just stepped into something like that. Problem is that she already knows that her family is against the relationship before they got serious, but I guess the forces of nature arejust too strong for her such that before she knew it, she was totally sucked into it and it just got too serious (in terms of feelings, I mean).

Inevitably, this would have a huge impact in one's life. Like the Chinese saying, "the flesh of your palm and the flesh on the back of your palm are the same", meaning, on one hand is your family whom you love, and in the other is the person whom you really want to spend more time to know and understand. To a certain extent, this has caused the individual to be not as cheerful a person as she used to be - looking blank and blur most of the time, so much in her mind and ignoring (unkowingly) her friends and colleagues - so much so that they (her friends) are avoiding her, giving her space to think.

It's tough, and I guess the question on what should one do in circumstances like these really depends on the individual. Some of the tough questions in life.

This has been going on for almost a month and it is still in the same state as it was when it all started. But I guess if you really think that he is the one and is worth it, then you should square it out with your family that it is your life and you are choosing some to the the rest of YOUR life time with - not THEIRS. But this also means that if everything screws up in the end and they (your family was right), then you are also screwing up your life, and your family does not want that. That's why, you need to be mature in this situation, step out of the "love circle" and see from the outside point of view and try to see it from their view. And more importantly, pray hard that you are not making a mistake. :) It's truly sad when a relationship has to go through this path. To some extent, you'll be thinking whether the both of you are really made for each other...

boon out...